Secrets and Lies
by xXSilentMelodiesXx
Summary: There were far too many secrets. To many lies. Ed's sick, and he's falling fast...
1. Chapter 1

**AU: **Hello there everyone! I'm not dead! Huzzah!

...And..I start writing a week BEFORE school starts...When I've had ALL summer...*Sweatdrop.*  
Well. The plot-bunny doesn't take requests.

Anyway. This is my first FullMetal Alchemist fict....And I'm kind of just whinging it. Big time. xD! So...Expect angst. I have NO clue what pairings are going to emerge. POSSIBILITIES ARE:

Roy/Riza  
Roy/Ed  
Parental!Ed  
Parental!Riza

Al/Winry are a given. And Ed/Rose are going to be mentioned, but just as a thing in the past....not a big deal. Reviews will probably help the outcome of this story...a lot XD 

Enough with my babbling. ONWARDS, MY MUSINGS! ONWAAAAARDS!!!

**Disclaimer: I own not Fullmetal Alchemist...If I did...It would be so mucb more dark, and filled with much angst.**

Roy Mustang sat at his desk wordlessly; yawning as he tapped his pen against the document he _should _be signing—along with the other pile of papers to the right of him. He pretended to be studying the contents of it to escape the scolding eyes of Riza (and her gun), who was currently preoccupied telling Furey about some recent report of a thief that was currently wandering around Central. It was the same one that he was suppose to send Fullmetal after when he got here, _whenever _he got here, since he never seemed to be able to get his ass here on time. He idly wondered if this was even an assignment that was worthy of being mentioned to the alchemist, but then again, he _was _the, 'almighty alchemist of the people'.

_There's always something…_ Roy thought dully. He yawned quiet loudly and dropped his head down on his desk with a loud 'thump'. He was tired of signing documents, and wished that Fullmetal would hurry up and get here and add some life to the place. Though it was true the blonde alchemist had grown up a bit since he had returned his brother's body back, he was far from level headed…and un-bothered by short comments. And now that Alphone's was back in Risembool, no one was there to hold him back…Which, to Roy, was rather amusing.

"Sir. Get back to work."

"But there are just so many documents and I couldn't possibly finish them all right away or even Today! Surely a smart and talented girl like you could understand that I just need a break a-"

_CLICK_

"…I Said, You should get back to work, Sir. Those papers need to be done today, and they will not sign themselves."

"…I think I'll get right on that, First lt. Hawkeye."

"Very good choice, sir."

He lifted his head up from his desk very professionally and, from the corner of his eye, could see Hawkeye retreating to her desk as she began disassemble her gun. Furey, Breda, and Havoc, who were also present in the room, where snickering in what they thought was a discreet manner. But, just as soon as they started…They were silenced by the sharp glare from the brown-eyed blonde who, didn't even have her gun in one piece.

_I outrank her. Yet, Riza is the one who barks around every military dog in this room with her gun. There _has _to be something wrong with this picture…_ He slid the paper to the side and grabbed another one from the tall pile on his right, scanning over it before signing it, and repeating the process with ease. _Well, I'm sure as hell not going to question it. He, personally, yes. But with a gun? Never in my life. There has to be a way to get to her._

"Sir."

_Hmm…Does she have a weakness? Animals aren't it. She acted as firmly as ever when Black Hayate was given to her…What else? _

"Sir, Fullmetal has arrived."

_Motherly instincts? … No. This is Hawkeye we're talking about. Well, what if—_

**BANG.**

Roy stumbled back and out of his seat; the fingers of his right hand pressed together firmly in the position of a snap that made almost everyone in the room start to edge back away. Riza, of course, stood still, and sighed as she lowered her gun. When had she even put that thing back together?

"Lower your hand, Sir. It was the only way to get your attention. And as I was saying, Fullmetal has arrived."

Sure enough, as his gloved hand slowly slacked, Fullmetal was seen sitting on the couch positioned in front of his desk. What surprised him though, is that unlike the rest of his team, he didn't appear to relax as he lowered his hand. He wasn't worked up in the first place; not even from Hawkeye's gun. Something definitely wasn't right here.

"Well good afternoon, Fullmetal. How nice of you to join us today. You're late."

Roy placed his pen down gently on his desk and rested his elbows down on it lightly; propping his head up on his hand as he gazed at him with calm-dark eyes. His only response from the younger teen was a small grunt of indifference and a quick sideways glance, which for some reason, ticked Roy's nerves.

"What, no excuse? Well, I guess you still can't run fast enough with those _short _legs of yours keeping you so close to the ground."

Roy allowed a small smirk to form, though it was safely half-hidden behind his folded gloved hands which where perched in front of his mouth. He expected the blonde to be up and out of his seat in a matter of seconds and screaming at Roy some completely, twisted up, exaggerated question about his 'short' comment, and judging from the looks around the room, he could see everyone getting ready for the event to unfold.

"Shut up, Colonel. Can I just give you the report and be done here?"

And just like that, the room seemed to stiffen.

Edward, the short-tempered Fullmetal Alchemist, had just brushed off a short comment.

He could see that his subordinates where just as shocked as he was, and where probably mimicking the same expression that he was holding, which was saying something. Havoc's cigarette had fallen from his mouth and Breda's whole jaw had gone slack. Furey was staring at Fullmetal with an unreadable expression, but the way he stood, it was easy to tell from just a glance that he was shocked from what he had just witnessed. Even Hawkeye was staring rather shocked at the alchemist; her expression unreadable to anyone who didn't know her, however.

"Very well, Fullmetal. Stand up and report your findings in Darghton."

Roy faintly noticed that the boy had flinched at the mentioning of the town as he stood up, but he shook it off as nothing. As the blond came to stand in front of his desk, he realized that it was the first time in a while that he had actually gotten a chance to get a good look at the kid since he had restored Al to his body, and worked full-time for the military. Almost immediately his brother had gone back to Risembool, which Roy found surprising, seeing as the boys had been so close for all those years. He always wondered why Ed didn't go back with him, but, he guessed it was because his brother and that automail mechanic got together. And after, he had been sent on some long-term mission which he had taken wordlessly. He knew about the mission—it wasn't very difficult, just far away. Look around, catch that newbie alchemist they were looking for—the sound alchemist—then come home.

Either way, he didn't like what he was seeing. His golden eyes where sullen and rimmed with dark circles, and his cloths seemed to almost hang off of him. His hair looked like it wasn't brushed and was just braided quickly, and he stood with so much less confidence then he had just not so long ago when he stood looking for the philosopher's stone. He never once looked at him, and his automail arm kept pulling at the sleeve of his left arm absent mindedly. What the hell was on this kid's mind? What happened?

"Fullmetal?"

"The mission was fine. I caught the guy—Jayden. Some guy in his mid thirties who thought that he knew everything because he was the only one in that town who knew how to perform alchemy. In the end, it was me or him – both of us couldn't walk out alive. But he had neglected to tell me that he had an apprentice, and apparently, let me kill him so he would attempt a human transmutation and become an artificial being—a homunculi."

Roy's eyes widened slightly at what the boy said. He watched his expression carefully—looking for something, anything, that might show that this was indeed why he looked as he did. But…He didn't find a thing. He didn't seem bothered by it-no more then he would if it was any other case. This bothered him. It was almost like he didn't care. The light in his eyes was gone, and he was still refusing to look at him.

"Luckily, I got there in time and stopped him from performing it and explained a few things to him…which seemed to snap him back to his senses." Ed paused for a moment, his gaze wandering around to numerous objects in the room, but never to Roy, nor anyone else. "Can I go now?"

"No you may not, Fullmetal. Not until you explain to me what is going on."

He saw the boy's expression twist up into one of confusion and it looked as though he was going to look up at him, but as though he was reconsidering it at the last second, he scoffed. "I don't know what you're talking about, Mustang. I just explained the whole mission to you."

Roy's fist tightened in aggravation. _Stay calm…Getting mad at the kid will not help any…_ "You know full well that's not what I mean, Fullmetal. And look at me when I'm talking to you."

"Tch. No need. I'm leaving." Ed turned around absently and waved him off, earning a rather obscenest growl from Roy as he reached out and wrapped his hand around the blonde's flesh arm. He almost regretted it, because underneath his grip, he felt the boy flinch as he whipped his head around to stare at him. And _that _was what made him let go. Those _eyes. _

Fullmetal was running out of the room before he was even able to catch even the smallest of breaths from what he had just seen.

**AN: I think I failed on an epinomical scale of eternal doom and dispare. =/ But...Oh well. I'm...Fairly pleased, at least. I want to keep going with this so...I'm hoping to hear from you guys! Anything is welcome, just please, flamers...Please tone it down a bit. :]**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Two updates in one day! Miracle!!**

**Anywho. Here's the next chapter. It gives some of what Ed's thinking, I guess...But for some reason, I'm not as pleased..I don't think I got his character enough when trying to get my own emotions shoved down his throat. Hmmm..Oh well! **

**Kumiko-kun: I'm glad you like it so far! Hopefully I won't lose your interest!  
Orange Singer: Being hooked is always a good thing! I DID update soon..Onlly a few hours!~**

**Disclaimer: I did not somehow magically gain the rights to FMA in a matter of hours. As awesome as that would be...It did not happen.**

He hated being in that room right then. He hated explaining things to that man—Mustang—For some reason, being near him, it was just making him anxious. The way he would look at him with those fucking dark blue eyes was agonizing, and it was almost like he could see every little thing that he was trying to keep hidden from him.

Edward shifted uncomfortably in front of the Flame Alchemist's desk, pulling at the left sleeve of his red coat absent-mindedly. "Can I go now?" He asked briskly, not really wanting to be in the room anymore. The air was suffocating and he knew it was probably just him, but it didn't matter. He wanted out and he wanted out _now_.

"No you may not, Fullmetal. Not until you explain to me what is going on."

_And that Colonel Bastard has the nerve to ask that…ask that as if he cares!_ Ed's face twisted up in some expression he wasn't even sure of himself, and he had to resist the urge of shooting his head up long enough to get an exact lock on where he was, just so he could punch his face in. But he quickly reconsidered the action when a wave of nausea rolled over him, and he spoke sharply through clenched teeth: "I don't know what you're talking about, Mustang. I just explained the whole mission to you."

He heard the fabric of Roy's glove tightening in his grip and he almost allowed himself a smirk, though he quickly reconsidered the actions and settled on keeping his sour expression. Leave the man to wonder. Leave him to pretend that he really does care for just a little longer, just so he can feel a little better about himself at the end of the day.

"You know that's not what I mean, Fullmetal. And look at me when I'm talking to you."

His eyes where angled on the ground now, and he could already see the picture before him getting fuzzy, and the all-too familiar black dots slowly started to dance their way across his eyes. And following right in toe was the headache…

"Tch. No need. I'm leaving." Ed turned around slowly and raised his hand carefully so not to throw him off balance. But what he wasn't expecting—what he hadn't accounted for—was that bastard colonel daring to _grab hold _of his flesh arm!

His eyes whipped around to the raven-haired man at the contact that it made his head spin. Golden eyes met dark-blue, and he knew then, that he had seen everything he was trying to hide. Because his stupid eyes always betrayed him.

Roy's hand flinched back almost instantly, and he took full advantage of this opportunity. He could feel all eyes on him and the Colonel, but he didn't care. It was his problem now. He high-tailed it out of the room as quickly as he possibly could; slamming the brown door behind him as he ran down the halls of Central Command.

_Fucking Colonel bastard…Can't leave things be can he…_Ed's stomach gave another sudden lurch and he dove into one of the many bathrooms in the building; thankful it to be empty as he emptied his insides into the porcelain god. His head was spinning and his arm protected violently from where Roy had grabbed him and he _knew _he had to get up but it felt like all his strength was just _gone_. If he was the type to just quit, god knows he would have already.

Grudgingly, he used his right arm to pull himself up and flushed; stumbling out of the stall to the sink as he switched the tap on and tried to rid his mouth of the awful taste. Hesitantly, he dared look up at himself in the mirror and almost smirked. He looked like absolute _shit, _and maybe even there that was an understatement. But staring at himself wouldn't do any good, so after a while, he slowly started to make his way out of the bathroom and back into the halls; hopefully, he could at least make it home.

-----

Roy, and just about everyone else in the office, stared at the door where Fullmetal had just run out of in…shock. Yes, shock was a good word. Because, to be honest, no one had a clue what had even brought that on. _But no one else had even seen that look in his eyes…_

"Is Edward alright, Sir…?"

He looked up, meeting Hawkeye's worried stare. He knew she cared for Edward as though he where her own son, so surely, she had noticed something was wrong as well. And if not, well, she would now.

"Furey! Breda! Havoc! You are dismissed!"

The three where silent for a moment before sighing to one another and nodding; straightening up, and saluting with a unified "Sir!" before exiting the room. Roy sighed and ran a hand through his hair. _I need a drink…Now…_

"About Edward, Sir…"

"Lt. Hawkeye. Did you notice anything strange about him?"

He was careful as to how he phrased his question so it wasn't as though he was insinuating anything on her. They sat in silence for a few minutes before it appeared she gave up and simply sighed.

"I cannot give you a valid reason, Sir, but I do believe that there is something very wrong with Ed."

Roy rose an eyebrow at that as he looked up at his partner. She stood before him as formal as ever, but her eyes betray what she was truly feeling. She was genuinely worried for the kid. _And maybe I was worried earlier…Maybe she does have a maternal side…_

"Agh this isn't the time to be thinking about that!"

"…Sir?"

Roy blinked, realizing he had spoken out loud before running a hand through his hair again and sighing as he shook his head. "Nothing. Now…What do you propose we do, in regards to Fullmetal?"

His gaze was again back on Hawkeye. He knew what she wanted to do. But he also knew that she couldn't do it while maintaining a professional persona. He could see this, and knew that she was mentally debating on what she should do. …And being the kind man that he is….

"Well. That settles it. I still need to give Fullmetal his next mission, since he so suddenly stormed out of my office today." He turned to glance out the window and saw that dark, grey clouds had already eclipsed the sky, and where starting to 'boom' with the threats of rain. He hated storms. He was doing this for the sake of Hawkeye only…And to cure his own curiosity.

_They say curiosity killed the cat…But hell. Satisfaction brought it back, right? _

**AN: Huzzah. Next chapter peek, because I'm awesome!**

_"You can point that gun at me all you want, Riza. But you should know better then to point it at someone if you have no intention to shoot.."_

_Ed's voice was tired; abused; waisted away; as though he had given up. You could hear the deafening 'click' from her gun as she readied it--the gun pointed directly at Ed's form. But he just laughed. He just laughed, and the tone sounded so wrong and misplaced in his voice that he almost wanted to reach out and shake him and scream, "Where is he!? Where's the real Edward?!"_

_But that would do nothing now. Because Fullmetal was grabbing the barrel of the gun, and placing it to his temple._

_"Shoot me, lieutenant. I dare you..."_

**Well, until next time! I love your guys's reviews, and I always responde. :] FREE COOKIES FOR ALL!!! ... **_Okay so maybe not Free..*Cough* .._


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Hello!~ I almost didn't update today. But...It kept bugging me until I finally gave in and said "FINE!"**

**Andrea Perrigo: **I'm not sure if this update counts as soon BUT...It's in the same day, right? xD!  
**Very Swampeh: **Lulz..! That peak was like, 'OhMyGod' for people to get `em to read. Lets..Just hope I did justice XD  
**Lady Monozuki: **Well I'm glad I got you interested!~ Hopefully, I didn't get you un-interested..  
**XxForest-DragonxX: **Yes! I must go on! I am not so cruel as to give you that, and leave you hanging for a week...Well, I hope not 

**Anywho. Enjoy! **

**_Disclaimer: I have not managed to snag up the rights of FMA in just one day._**

For once, Ed was glad that he didn't live too far off from Central Command.

He shuffled through the streets in a very uncharacteristic way—sloppy and without form. He could tell that he was getting numerous strange looks from people as he would pass him by but at that point, as he was, he just couldn't will himself to care. Every few minutes his body could be wracked with numerous dry coughs that he swore would be the very thing to cause him to drop dead right there but, something told him that would _not _be the best of ideas at the moment.

_C'mon Ed…You know you want to put yourself out of your misery…If you allowed yourself to give up here, in a crowd of people, you'd just be brought back with more questions than you would want to answer…_

He growled to himself from under his red hood; the rain beating down on him harshly as he finally started to near his apartment. _`Shut up brain,' _he thought in an acidic tone. _`No one asked you to speak up…' _

A laugh, which he knew all too well from over these past few weeks was not his own, echoed though his mind and made him flinch. He hated that sound. He hated it because it came from some _twisted _part of him, and he wasn't even sure how it came to be. He just wanted it gone—free of the comments it always seemed to have to bare.

_Awe don't be like that…Like you said…I'm you. I'm only voicing your inner most desires…the things you want most, but are too afraid to say…_

Ed chose to ignore that statement as he dragged himself up the stairs to his room; quickly twisting his keys into the door and pushing it open. Cold air seemed to rush over him immediately as he stepped in and swung the door shut behind him; making sure that it was locked. Not really caring that he was soaking wet, he slid off his red jacket and tossed it to the floor by the front door and simply kicked off his shoes someplace nearby. _`God, why the hell is it so damn cold in here?' _

_You probably have a fever, Ed. Hah. I wonder why…_

Annoyed with the voice that hadn't seemed to want to leave him alone at all today, he slammed his left fist into the wall abruptly; glaring out across the room at nothing as he screamed a hoarse, "Shut up!" before his body was wracked with another set of violent coughs that sent his slender form to the floor. He could again hear that agonizing laughter echoing from within his mind, and as much as he hated to admit it, he knew he was right. Everything that bastard dared to say had been right!

_Of course, I know best Ed…I'm you after all…I know what you want, and what you need…Just let go; I promise, it won't hurt anymore after… _There was a small pause in his speech, and it was only then that he dared look down toward his flesh arm. Inwardly, he flinched at the sight which only seemed to coax the Voice to go further. _See? You've come this far. Just a few more…Just a little deeper…That's all it'll take; if that's the way you'll choose to go…_

It was plain as day without the coat hiding it. Several, hesitant little red cuts flourished across his pale skin like feathers, but that wasn't what even caught his sight. Those where the times he was doing it to get a feel for it—to see If he minded it. But no; what made him sick from just _looking _at it where the two parallel cuts that crossed right over each other; one going straight down his arm, and the other half way across. The tissue around it was raw and red, and it wasn't scabbing over correctly. Puss was seeping from the wounds, and truly it was a sight to see. Hell…If he wasn't so deadest of killing himself now, the infection would do it for him at this rate.

But at this point, he was just sick of looking at it.

Not really caring that it was still wet, he grabbed his coat that was lying in a rumpled heap by the door and pulled it on; shuddering as the cold wetness chilled his body even more. Again, he could hear the faint echo of the laughing in his mind but, this time, he was able to somewhat ignore it as he managed to drag his feet to the couch and sit, grinning. He didn't know why he was doing that…God knows he wasn't happy, but maybe, he had finally cracked. He and his brother had started looking for that stone when they where thirteen, and four years after that…He still had found himself bound to the military.

_How cute…You where always protesting about how you wouldn't dare become a true 'dog of the military', even when they kept you on such a long leash. But truth of the matter is, you still became faithful to your master when granted the choice of freedom. It was all you knew, because you're an orphan…_

Edward laughed. He laughed because the Voice was right. Laughed because even after all those things he said, he was still no better than anyone else in the military. He was weak. He was just some stubborn, loud mouthed orphan who was somehow gifted with the talent of alchemy.

_That's right…_The Voice purred; feeding off of his thoughts. _You don't need to live with this any longer…_

There was a loud _'Clap' _that could be heard after, and the transmutation of metal.

-----

Roy Mustang _really _hated the rain. Even though he was in a car, he still hated it as he watched it hit and slide of the windows in some unknown rhythm that he couldn't hear. He hadn't ever minded it unless he was stuck out in it, but, after Hughes' death…He couldn't help but associate rain with death. Maybe that's why he really suggested the idea of visiting Fullmetal; to put his own mind at ease. And the more and more he thought about it, the more idiotic it was starting to sound. What kind of trouble could that kid really get into now?

"We're here, Sir."

Roy blinked as he looked out the front window and sure enough, they were parked out in front of an apartment complex. _'So this is where Fullmetal lives…' _He thought idly; undoing his seatbelt and stepping out into the cold rain. He sighed.

"Alright, lead the way."

Hawkeye nodded stiffly as she headed up the flights of stairs, and he let out another sigh and a small grin as he followed close behind. He really wondered if she ever loosened up at all, and if she did, when? He'd known her since they where children and, even though she wasn't exactly like this then, she was still…very strict.

After a while, and three flights of stairs, they stopped in front of a pale red door. _'Really, was it just luck that the kid found a door of this color, or what?' _He thought idly before knocking on the door once. No answer.

"Fullmetal?"

He waited for a moment before knocking again, and right before he did, he heard something. It was faint, at first, but the sound seemed to pick up and it was only after it did that he finally identified what it was. Coughing.

"Fullmetal! Open this door right now!" He banged on it a few more times and the coughing didn't seem to go down, but it also didn't seem to be getting closer which meant he was making no move to let him in. He let out a low growl and he could see Hawkeye beside him; a porcelain image of worry that personified the feeling hidden inside him.

"Fullmetal! Fullmetal! Edward!" He called out again, banging a few more times. This was getting them nowhere, and he knew it. Stepping back as he prepared to kick the door down, he heard something. Something that scared him more than the coughing had.

Silence.

Growling, he threw his foot into the door and, much to his liking, it gave way. _And this is why I hate the rain. _He allowed himself that idle thought before he came charging into the room and scanned it quickly, searching for the small teen. When he came across him however, he wasn't pleased with that he saw. Not at all.

"Edward!"

His eyes widened slightly from the form that flew past him, and the voice that was not his own: Hawkeye. She was kneeling down beside the boy who was lying on the couch in an awkward position; visibly soaked. Roy watched her as she pressed her hand firmly against the kid's forehead and flinched at the weak moan that passed through his lips at the contact. Her hand was drawn away immediately and her eyes where then shot to his; wide, and uncertain. She was scared. Was he going to…?

"He's..—He's got a very high fever, Sir…" She said in a voice that was hardly above a whisper. Hawkeye was still staring at him; waiting for him to give her an order, waiting for him to act as the superior officer that he was. But at that moment, the only thing that seemed to play through his mind was the night Hughes died—Lost among the countless other soldiers who, after time, would no longer have a name. Fullmetal—No, Edward, would he become like this to?

"Sir!"

He blinked a few times at his subordinate's voice; her eyes hardening somewhat. He tried the best he could to shake the thought from his head and made his way over to the young alchemist as Hawkeye stood up and walked over to the other side of the room; obviously not wanting to be somewhere she knew she could do nothing.

Roy tore his glove from his right hand and placed it against the boy's forehead; pulling it back almost immediately. Hawkeye was right. He _did _have a fever. He was burning up.

"Th' fuck…Colonel…" Roy blinked a few times as he stared down at the blonde who, at that moment, seemed as though he was struggling to just get in enough air to breath, let alone talk. Gold eyes once again stared up into his, but this time, they where dull and unfocused, and it seemed to take a while for it to register what was going on. But when he did, he practically shot up from his lying position on the couch and glared.

"What the _fuck _are you doing in my apartment, God damn it!? Who the hell gave you permission to-" He stopped as another wave of coughs shot through his body; his whole form shaking violently. Roy wasn't too sure what to do, and truth be told…He was scared shitless for the kid.

Carefully, he pushed him back down to a sitting position on the couch which seemed to help slightly; seeing as the boy batted away his hands the moment he re-gained his breath.

"At this point, my reasons shouldn't really matter, Fullmetal. You're sick and you need to visit a hospital."

At that, his head seemed to shoot up and something, he didn't quite know what yet, flickered behind those gold optics that he didn't like. "I'm fine. Go away."

Roy sighed at this; resisting the urge to push his hair back like he usually did when he was aggravated. Why did the boy always have to be so stubborn? "Obviously you're not, Fullmetal. If you're not going to come willingly, I will have no trouble bringing you by force."

He stood there looking down at the boy for a few seconds, and he saw his shoulders droop. Apparently, he was going to be easy this time and save him some trouble.

_CLAP_

Roy blinked for a moment before he saw that the noise had come from the younger teen transmuting his automail to—to a blade? He wanted to question it, but he didn't even have the time to run it through his mind before it was send up along his left hand with surprising precision; slicing right across the transmutation that was sewn into it. And as luck would have it…The glove to his right hand was underneath his boot from when he had taken it off to check his temperature.

He felt a bead of sweat slide down the side of his face as he stood there; the steel automail blade pressed up against his neck and that look in his eyes held no doubt that he would do it. That look petrified him; he had never seen such malice in his eyes; not for him…

Then, he heard shuffling, and something being drawn.

Roy looked up to see where the noise had come from and, he was shocked to see it coming from Hawkeye's shaking hand who was standing just a ways off from both of us; her gun aimed directly at Fullmetal. The fear in her eyes where clear as day, and seeing it in her, of all people, was a bit unraveling. He really hoped it wouldn't come down to her having to shoot. He didn't know if she could.

"You can point that gun at me all you want, Riza. But you should know better than to point it at someone if you have no intention to shoot..."

Ed's voice was tired; abused; wasted away; as though he had given up. You could hear the deafening 'click' from her gun as she readied it--the gun pointed directly at Ed's form. But he just laughed. He just laughed, and the tone sounded so wrong and misplaced in his voice that he almost wanted to reach out and shake him and scream, "Where is he!? Where's the real Edward?!"

But that would do nothing now. Because Fullmetal had lowered his blade from his neck and slowly wandered over to where Hawkeye stood; grabbing the barrel of her gun and placing it right on his temple. The boy just _smirked _as he stood there, and he honestly couldn't believe that he was looking at the same Edward Elric.

"Shoot me, lieutenant. I dare you..."

**AN: ...AND I leave you with a cliffie. Lol! I have a feeling that was cruel...Giving you a peak to the next chapter, FILLING that next chapter with junk, and then FINALLY when you get to the part you saw and where waiting for!--It ends. **

**Yes, my friend. The fates are cruel...But, y'know, No one's ever totally nice xD**

**Anyway. I hope this came out somewhat okay. I changed it so many times, I'm not even kidding.. I just couldn't seem to get it right. But the next chapter will be better, and will have more then just idle FILLERS in it.**

**~!PEEK!~**

_He felt his fist connect firmly with his cheek, and he felt himself stumble back, but for some reason it all didn't seem to register to him. He was on the ground now and staring up into cold, cold, blue eyes, and felt a firm hand gain a tight hold on his left arm. It practically took everything he had not to scream._

_"So this is how you think it's alright to spand your time!? This is what you've been doing!? You're NOT a kid anymore, Edward! Grow up, and stop Acting like one!"_

_He watched as he stormed out, and closed his eyes as the door slammed. The warm, red liquid was seeping through the bandages now, but he didn't care. He didn't even bother to look._

_'Don't worry...We can make this all go away...'_


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Yes! Update! Huzzah!  
Sorry. School was being annoyingggg!!~ I'm suprised I got this done, actually. Amazing what happenes when you actually sit down and concentrate!!**

**Now to my lovely reviewers!**

**Lishtar: **I totally get what you're saying. Roy is hard to get in character though, and still stick with the storyline...And don't kill me this time, because I think I made Edward more then a little OOC here! !!!  
**Very Swampey: **Yes; voices that are NOT your own generally aren't good! Hawkeye would make a good mother. Hopefully though, she wouldn't shoot near the kid to get her to obey, like she did with the dog....  
**Madame Poppy: **Cliffie's are fun. I now see the appeal for the authors...MUHAHAHAHAHA!! And you too. DON'T KILL ME! I really think I messed up Edward's character. GRR!!!  
**ZukoFlame: **Yay! Glad I managed to get `ya hooked!!~  
**Andrea Perrigo: **I don't think this counts as an 'update soon', but it WAS an update xD! But the fact you want me to continue means I'm going something right, doesn't it? xD!

**And thank you SOO much to all the people who are silently watching my story! Glad to know you all enjoy it!**

**-------**

_"Shoot me, lieutenant. I dare you..."_

He could feel the whole room tense at his words, and even the cold air that circled around his skin wasn't as thick as the dread and surprise that seemed to surround them all. He meant full well what he said. He knew that Riza was far more faithful to Roy then she was to he, and he planned to use that to his advantage. He was taking a risk. He understood that. If things went wrong—If she didn't shoot—Then there would be a lot of questions. It would just complicate things…

"I'm sorry, Edward…"

He looked up at that; his tired eyes locking on Riza's pain-stricken face as the words flowed past her lips. She was going to shoot…But why? To prove a point? In reality the point didn't matter, as long as she ju—

Her gun was removed from his head, and instead connected firmly with the pressure point on his neck; sending him falling to the ground, and once again being eclipsed in the comforting Darkness.

-------

Fullmetal's body fell to the floor in a shivering heap; Roy's own body running on auto-pilot as he made three long strides and picked the shivering teen up from the floor. Frozen dark blue eyes looked up towards a female blonde; narrowing slightly as he was able to take in her current status. She was shocked, and shaken, and pale as though she had just saw a ghost.

Or, as though she just had to point her gun seriously towards one of her own men, and one no less that she thought of as a son.

"Hawkeye. Snap out of it. We need to get Fullmetal to a hospital right now, and it would be better to do so before he awakens and wants to pull another stupid stunt like he just did."

Roy's voice seemed un-phased by the current situation, and his blonde subordinate seemed actually quite pleased. There was one sharp nod from her and a quick salute as she barked a sharp "sir!" before walking hastily out the door to go start the car. He was left in the apartment alone with the quivering teen in his arms, and right then, he felt completely alone.

_Please don't let me have to lay down yet another member of my team. Not someone this young._

-------

Darkness. No matter where he looked, that's all he could see. Surrounded by it—covered by it—drowning in it—He couldn't even be sure if his eyes where even open.

But then, there someone in front of him. A boy.

Blonde hair. Black cloths. Blonde hair. _Golden eyes._

He was staring at a crystal clear image of himself. The person's blonde hair was down, and his eyes where narrowed in a way that was slightly foreign to how his were. There was a look of contentment on his face, and he somehow knew that it was different from his own, which was currently turned upside down in a scowl. Somehow, that was beginning to feel very common to him.

"_Well hello there, Edward…I wasn't thinking I would be able to speak with you again…Looks like you couldn't carry out your plan."_

He shivered—Or he thinks he did—At the voice that came from his doppelganger. It was his own, but somehow, so much more smooth; lustful. So full of something—pride? It sounded disgusting in his ears. Like the person thought he owned the world, and no one could ever approach him.

"Why am I here," he heard his own voice say. His Other seemed to glance up at him now, and it was a bit unraveling to see the expression he wore not his own. The other him just shrugged; that stupid look of indifference starting to tug at his nerves.

"_Because. You have entered a state of unconsciousness, and where most people would be experiencing dreams, well…You're stuck here talking to me."_

"And who _are _you!" His voice growled back; the strong tone back in his voice and he was thankful that it was no longer saturated with the heavy weakness of sickness and pain.

"_Quite honestly, I'm surprised you never asked before…" _The fluid voice purred; golden eyes once again mirroring his own. _"For a name…Well, I suppose you could call me Pride."_

He stood there for a moment in silence; an expression of shock and confusing flickering across his features that where clear as day in the darkness. Pride? Only one group of people referred to themselves by the Seven Deadly Sins, and that was those who were created by failed human transmutations…

"_You seem confused, Edward…" _The voice—Pride—said mockingly. _"No, I am obviously not a homunculus…But I do embody Pride. That is _your _individual sin that you carry, Edward. Each person has one."_

"…What?" That was all he was able to slip past his lips, and quite honestly, it was the only thing he could think of to say. Even if it did make him sound like an absolute idiot. Pride's body still remained still, but his golden eyes rolled before staring back at him as though—surprise surprise—he was an idiot.

"_Your sin, Edward. I'm an embodiment of it—even if not in true flesh and blood. I'm still attached to you." _He then paused for a moment as though he was contemplating how to word what he had to say next. _"As you know, homunculus embody sins in every way possible. You can see them. Feel them. Touch them. They respond to the five senses, and they are truly able to live. But everyone has a sin…"_

Pride grinned; his flesh hand reaching up to run it through his blond hair—Hair that didn't belong to him.

"_Have you ever wondered how homunculus are really created, Edward?" _He said; his grin widening as he got no reply, _"As I said earlier, each person has a sin inside him. And when someone attempts a human transmutation and fails…Well, the sin of that person is released to become a homunculus of the person who was attempted to be transmuted. It happened to your brother. His whole body was devoured; therefore, _his _sin was released in the form of your mother. Sloth. Usually only one person attempts it, but, since you both where, I was simply…awakened. So you see, Ed, I've always been there. For four years, I've lived here, awakened, in your mind. Waiting to find something to push on. And I finally found it."_

He couldn't breathe. How could this be true? Was this what has been happening—was this really the Truth? He couldn't believe it…

"_Time for you to wake up, Edward Elric. But don't worry…I'll still be here as you re-enter the world of the living."_

His echoing laugh was the last thing he heard before a bright light suddenly surrounded him, and pain swam back into his body.

-------

Roy had been sitting in the waiting in the front office of the hospital for a while now, along with both Hawkeye and Havoc. Why was Havoc here? Because Hawkeye needed someone to keep her in line, which meant, her having someone to keep in line herself. Havoc didn't even know why he was here. He was just following orders.

…And he had been poking Roy's side for about five minutes now, trying to get a word out of the stone flame alchemist who hadn't said a word since he had arrived.

"Uh, Chief? If I have to be here, can I at least know why?" He didn't receive an answer. He felt him move in closer to his ear and cuff it on the side that Riza was on, most likely so she couldn't make out what he would say by reading his lips. "…And does it have anything to do with why Lt. Hawkeye hasn't pulled her gun out to silence me like she usually does?"

His eyes widened as his head whipped to the side to stare at the other male officer, who only gave a faint grin. He was almost as good as Maes had been sometimes. Almost.

"I'll take that as a yes." He stood back up from the seat and stretched; once again beginning his journey back and forth the small area that was the entrance of the building.

"YOU BETTER GET THAT GODDAMN NEEDLE OUT OF ME RIGHT NOW!!!"

Roy's head as immediately jerked up from its propped position in ins hand as he stood; rushing quickly towards the room that was just down the hall from them. When he arrived there, he threw the door open and stood there for a moment; hearing Hawkeye and Havoc now behind him.

…And there sat Fullmetal on the bead, harassing the nurse who looked scared shitless. And that was an understatement.

He was sitting up in bed with a bandage over his flesh arm, and an IV drip hanging out from there as well. …Which explained his outburst.

"Uh, Lt.," Havoc murmured quietly under his breath behind him. "Edward is placed in the hospital regularly due to mission based injuries…And this doesn't seem any different. Is there a specific reason I'm here?"

"…No. You're dismissed."

"Am I going to get an expla—"

"_Dismissed._"

"Y-Yes Ma'am."

Havoc's rushed footsteps soon disappeared down the hall, and Roy stepped into the room and looked at the nurse and smiled.

"Miss, do you think you could give my subordinate and I a moment alone?" His voice was perfectly smooth, and as usual, the women was easily swooned to his 'charm'. From beside her, he could see Fullmetal scoff at them both. The nurse, who had both of her hands on her clipboard which was raised up to her face, nodded and bowed slightly.

"O-Of course, t-take as long as you need! A-And feel free to..to call me if you need anything…"

The blush on her face was evident as he smiled; the women quickly rushing out the door. Roy glanced back to stare at Hawkeye who only nodded; shutting the door in front of her to give them some privacy. His attention was then directed back to Fullmetal.

"So…Mind explaining to me what happened back there in your apartment?"

His golden eyes where back on me in a second, but he only yawned and stretched his arms up and over his head.

"Eh…The bastard I was chasing back on my mission got in a cheap shot and managed to slice into my arm," He held up his left arm; showing the already visible bandage. "and I thought I had cleaned it properly and bandaged it but heh…Guess not. It got infected." He laughed, and it sounded half-hearted. He then pulled the IV out of his arm.

"Where's your car? You took me here, and now you're `gonna take me back."

"Fullmetal—"

He was already out the door, and from what Roy could tell, he was following Riza to…His car. So without seeing any other thing to do, he followed in toe of his two subordinates.

He would ask about the incident back at the apartment later.

-------

Edward just wanted to go home, crawl into bed, and fall asleep. He was _exhausted_. And that, to him, was an understatement as he leaned against the window inside the car.

"_So, Edward, what are you planning to do?...You failed, and no one is prying…You could very easily continue your plan…"_

He growled, which earned a strange look from Roy in the passengers steat which he promptly ignored.

'Shut up, Pride. No one asked you.'

"_But that's exactly why I asked…You need to plan these things out…When you acted on impulse, with that blonde gunman…It didn't work out properly."_

He stayed quiet to that one. His ultimatum hadn't changed, it had just been delayed. Pride's laugh once again echoed through his thoughts.

"We're here, Fullmetal."

Ed looked up and blinked; they got there pretty fast. He nodded his thanks and opened the door as he started running up the stairs to his apartment; ignoring the Colonial's yelling as he did so. By time he got up there he just opened the door; it must have been unlocked since they didn't have his key when they took him to the hospital. Ed rolled his eyes.

"_The sooner the better. They won't come back anytime soon to check on you; they know you need your 'rest'."_

He shut the door behind him and walked back over to the couch; reaching his hand down the side of it between the cushions and pulled out a razor. His mind was still hazed from the medicine that they gave him but he ignored it. Being hesitant again, he left a few cuts on his shoulder to get use to it again, and he heard Pride chuckle within his mind. But that's when he heard his door swing open.

-------

"God damn the Fullmetal and not being able to stay still long enough to obey one single order…"

Roy mumbled as he marched his way up the second flight of stairs; finally starting up the third. This was one too many times for him; He was looking forward to going home, having a drink, then falling asleep. But once again Fullmetal had managed to delay that…

Finally being on the third story, he made his way towards his door and threw it open abruptly as he stepped in.

"I left my glove in here, which you so kindly cut through and I kind of need that back before I can—"

His eyes settled on Fullmetal, and saw what he was holding in his automail hand. He saw what he was doing. Saw what was running down his arm.

Roy was livid.

-------

Edward was frozen. It had never even phased him that the Colonial would come back up for his glove. But there he was—His dark blue eyes staring into his, and he looked absolutely _furious. _

"_Oh my. What do we have here…Your commanding officer does Not look pleased…"_

He was not in the mood to think of a retort to Pride's comment. Hell, he couldn't even think of what to do then!

He quickly stood up; his mouth opening to give an excuse, to tell him it wasn't what it looked like—to say _anything_—But no sound seemed to escape his lips. He was stuck there, frozen under the raven haired man's gaze. He had no clue what was coming, but judging just by his look, it didn't appear good.

He started to make his way towards him, and his whole body tensed. The way his movement was; it frightened him. He didn't look like a soldier. He looked like a father, who's child was going to get the beating of his life.

…And then, he felt Roy's fist connect firmly with his cheek; the blade falling to the ground as he stumbled back. For some reason, it all didn't seem to be registering to him. There was another punch—this time to his chest, and now he was on the ground; staring up into cold, cold dark blue eyes that threatened to swallow up his very existence. But then suddenly he was yanked up; fingers curling around his flesh arm around the bandages, and it took everything he had just not to scream.

"So this is how you think it's alright to spend your time!? This is what you've been doing!? You're NOT a kid anymore, Edward! Grow up, and stop acting like one!"

He watched as Roy stormed out, and closed his eyes as the door slammed shut shortly after. He could feel the red, warm liquid seeping through the bandages now, but he just couldn't will himself to care. He didn't even look.

He felt his body slump back into the ground on his knees, and his head directed towards the ground. He was numb; empty. Nothing seemed real to him. Nothing seemed relevant.

"_Don't worry…We can make all of this go away…For real this time…"_

He truly took comfort, for the first time, in that thought that came from his Sin.

-------

**AN: Wewt. We got a little peak into what Ed's been thinking. But, I'm really not sure if I'm happy with this xD! Well. Nothing I can do about it now, right? I just REALLY hope I didn't screw up the story with causing Ed to be so OOC!! (I think he was.)**

**~;PEAK;~**

_I left him alone. I saw the cuts. I saw the blade. But I still left him _alone.

_He was still pacing around the area; his hand clenched in a tight fist as he focused on keeping his exppression nertral. It was working, but his mind was racing. He had made a mistake. A big one. One that would cost a sixteen year old's life._

_We forced him, a puppy, to play with the big dogs of the military. And he did. He played the part marvously._

_But mentally, he just wasn't ready. And we had broken. Each and every one of us had broken him, slowly. Broken him to the point that suicide could even be concidered._

_And instead of acting like an adult and comforting him, I yelled. I yelled because I didn't think, and allowed myself to succumb to those pitiful emotions._

_If Hughes had yelled at me back then...Would I still be here?_


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Okay. Who knows what I was thinking when I wrote this. For all I know, it makes no sense xD! I think it might jump around too much…Meh. There are some things I need to point out though.**

**This chapter features quiet a lot of Unstable!Ed (Whoever thought of that Word!Character thing anyway?) so, it's not just me putting him OOC… I hope xD! Remember that episode with Barry the Chopper and Winry? Imagine that one. (That was epic. Terrified!Ed is wonderful.)**

**Remember how I mentioned Rose back in…What, chapter 1? Well, she FINALLY makes an 'appearance.' And no. It's not her last I don't think. Lol…**

**Okay. Enough with those now. Oh. And there's a bit of Selfish!Ed here too. Wow lets think. Pride, and selfishness. Don't those two kind of go together? Amazing how things work that way! **

To my Lovely reviwers!

Lishtar: Please keep your chainsaw to yourself for the time being...I NEED ALL FUNCTIONING BODY PARTS TO CONTINUEEEE!~~~ And I'm glad you liked it xD! Yess...Pride!Ed is amazing and so fun. And I have something awesome (Or so I think) planned for the next chapter involving it...MUHAHAHAHA!!

Very Swampeh: Thanks; glad you liked my random on spot explanation! xD! Even though the manga so kindly blew That one away....Lol! But such is the world of fanfiction!~ .. And I hightly doubt this was a fast update xD!

ZukoFlame: Yeahh...Notice how Roy never apologized to Ed directly? Oh isn't he just nice! But he made up for it!~ ... Kiiinda..

XxForest-DragonxX: Well wait no more, m'dear! The next chappies here! ... Hay! That rhymed! I'm a poet and I didn't even know it 8D

Black-Ice-Alchemist: Nah. Didn't get my idea from there...I saw it in a random fanfict a few years back or something and it's just stuck until now. Ed fits the part wonderfully!

Animecatgirl1123: I knowww...Poor Ed...But it is for the sake of Fanfiction!!

**And thanks so much to all the story fave/watches that I got from you all! Silent viewers, you are all just as awesome and make me feel wonderful for writing this !! (Heart) ONE DOLLER COOKIES FOR ALL!~ **(What? Did you think they would be free? Get real!)

**Disclaimer: I do not own FMA. Needless to say, if I did, my procrastionation would lead to the plot never being continued.**

**--------**

_Human kind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return.  
To obtain, something of equal value must be lost.  
That is the law of equivalent exchange._

_In those days…_

_We truly believed that to be the world's One, and Only Truth._

--------

_No one had ever seen her get truly and honestly mad at Roy Mustang. Sure, she had gotten ticked off once, but never mad. But this time, she was not so sure she could resist temptation, and find it in her to forgive the very man she had vowed to protect._

_A young Alchemist might die today. One she thought of as a son. She didn't know what she would do…If it came down to another funeral, especially of someone so young. She just didn't know._

--------

Edward's eyes where dark and sullen; he hated the fact that Roy had seen what he was doing. Hated that look of pure _disgust _that he wore on his face. Hated that it was directed to him and to him only.

"_Forget about him. It doesn't matter what he thinks."_

Pride's voice made his blood boil.

"Shut _up! _It's because _You're _here that he saw this! It's because you're the one telling me to do this shit!"

His raspy voice bounced around the room, and he realized he had yelled that out loud. No one was there so it didn't matter but, it was still aggravating. And the aggravation kept building when he heard Pride's laughter from within his mind. He absolutely _loathed _that tone; the very one that was the same as his, but so very wrong.

"_You are trying to blame _me _Edward Elric? Must I remind you who committed the taboo, and brought his brother down with him? Must I remind you who _failed_? Do I really need to tell you who got let off the easiest by The Truth? It was _you _Edward Elric, Fullmetal alchemist!"_

"SHUT UP ALREADY!! GET OUT OF MY FUCKING HEAD!!" Ed's voice yelled; his teeth clenched as he gripped a clump of his hair with his hands. He hated that fucking voice he knew wasn't his. He just wanted him to _Shut Up!_ But no. _NoNoNoNoNo… _He was forced to live with it, as a price for his taboo. For _equivalent exchange_.

"_That's right, Ed. Equivalency. This is your punishment."_

He heard himself growl as he yanked his left hand out of his hair and threw it towards the wall. He felt the hair tie fall from his hair, and his uneven labored breathing. He wished that stupid Sin would leave him alone.

Equivalent exchange…To gain, something of equal value must be lost. But…But out of everything he had given up…Why wasn't he _gaining _anything?! His mother – When his brother and he tried to transmute her, they failed. But…But then Hoenheime… It wasn't even his mother he had brought back from the gate! Even the most important person to him in his life…Rose…She…-- She never did anything and she was taken!

"_Alchemy holds the law of equivalency, just as you said…For the sin you and your brother committed, you must find a way to atone for it. This is what The Truth said."_

"_WHAT MORE DO I HAVE TO DO?! WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE BEING PUNISHED!?"_ He felt his body fall to the floor as warm tears started to seep from his eyes. The aching in his left arm had yet to subdue, and the once white bandages that where rapped there where now bled crimson with blood. He felt so drained; he wasn't sure why. There was a small puddle of his blood lying there beside him from the wounds, but the physical pain didn't seem to bother him so much. It was everything else…

"_Why do you have to be the only one punished? You started this all, Ed…You're the only one to blame."_

He slammed his automail fist into the ground; his bloodshot eyes staring up towards something he couldn't see. "I was Not the only one that night who tried to bring Mother back…My brother was there too. And what price does _he _have to pay. I sold myself to the military to get his body back. Lost the love of my life to some sick, twisted act of 'God'. Had my brother once he was back in flesh and blood leave me. Had to sit there at his wedding with my childhood friend and first love. Watch how in love they were. Constantly take shit from my commanding officer. And what did I get!? Nothing! Just more suffering and war! WHERE IS THE EQUIVALENCY THERE!?"

"_Dear, dear Edward…Second born son of Hoenheime of Light…Know this…You life was doomed to be plagued with suffering the moment you where brought into this world…"_

"Why me?! ANSWER ME, PRIDE! WHY DID YOU TAKE ROSE TOO!"

For the first time, he wanted to hear an answer from his Sin. But of course the one time he did, he was welcomed with silence which was soon replaced by the agonizing laughter from the very existence he was really starting to loath.

It was then that he felt wet arms wrap around him and help him up from the ground. And it was then that he realized that it had been the last person that he had wanted to see.

"…Fullmetal?"

He wasn't sure how to respond to that. However, apparently his body was. He threw his automail arm back into the older man's gut, and saw him stagger back. He took the opportunity to slink out around him and out of the apartment; not wanting to be bothered by the stares so he grabbed on with his right arm and swung himself over. It bothered him that the other make was mimicking his footsteps.

--------

"Riza!" Ha barked as he started to run down the alleyway that Fullmetal was on. "Get back to central now! That's an order!" He didn't look to see if she had even heard him, or was planning on listening. First priority right then was catching Fullmetal.

"Edward! Stop where you are right now!"

He huffed when he saw that he wasn't going to, and, he couldn't help but realize that it was partially his fault since he yelled at him. But…Was it? Who was Pride?

"_I was Not the only one that night who tried to bring Mother back…My brother was there too. And what price does he have to pay. I sold myself to the military to get his body back. Lost the love of my life to some sick, twisted act of 'God'. Had my brother once he was back in flesh and blood leave me. Had to sit there at his wedding with my childhood friend and first love. Watch how in love they were. Constantly take shit from my commanding officer. And what did I get!? Nothing! Just more suffering and war! WHERE IS THE EQUIVALENCY THERE!?" _

"_Why me?! ANSWER ME, PRIDE! WHY DID YOU TAKE ROSE TOO!"_

It was the fact that he used the name 'Pride' while no other person was in the room. And the way he explained those things…Was this even the same Edward?

The blonde alchemist finally stopped, and he did as well just a foot away. He didn't turn to face him, instead, he just stood there as the rain slid down his body. Would he attack again? Roy's eyes narrowed slightly and positioned his right hand; the rain would lessen the heat of his flames, so in this case, it was a good thing.

"Why are you here, General."

"Because weather you like it or not, you are my subordinate and I need to run along behind them and make sure that nothing happens to them." He watched the alchemist turn around to face him, and he said nothing for a moment before his eyes narrowed. It was like someone had said something to him that he didn't like.

Too bad he didn't have to long to contemplate it before he charged at him; transmuting his automail arm and attempting to impale him.

Damn the rain.

--------

"Because weather you like it or not, you are my subordinate and I need to run along behind them and make sure nothing happens to them.

He turned around to face him; searching for something on him that might probe that he actually cared. That he cared about _him_.

"_Give up, Edward…He doesn't care about you. He just thinks you're another dog he can pull around by the leash. And you're his prized little puppy. So talented, and giving him so much recognition. The hero of Ishbal and The hero of the People. How quaint."_

He scowled; his eyes narrowing at his 'commanding officer'. He knew Pride was right on that one—All he was to that bastard was a way to get closer to becoming Fuher. He really was never anything to him. No one in the military was.

He transmuted his automail to a blade and sent it straight up towards the General's neck; missing only slightly as he managed to dodge to the side. It would take him longer to build up a flame since , instead of starting out small like he usually did, he had to start out big because of the rain for it to even last.

"Fullmetal! Stop this right now!"

"Why should I!"

He clapped his hands together and sent them to the ground palms-down. He wouldn't be able to dodge this one. He wouldn't have time to create an explosion.

The ground sparked blue and numerous concrete poles came out from the ground; each one's target the same. He managed to dodge most of them but—One of them finally hit.

--------

He felt one of the beams finally knick him in his side; having barly a second to snap his fingers and create an explosion that sent him to the ground, Edward then started to walk towards him slowly. He attempted to make another spark with his left hand before it was punctured with the blade from Fullmetal's arm. He stared up into gold eyes, and he wondered briefly if this is how it would happen. But then something happened.

"Shut up!"

--------

So easy ….

He knew full well that he wouldn't be standing here if Roy was taking this seriously. If he had truly been trying to take him down, then he would have been lying in a burnt heap of flesh and metal by now. He saw the one beam that he thought hit him lying in a broken heap on the ground; Roy next to it. He still wasn't attacking. Maybe he does care…

_Of course he doesn't, Ed. Finish him. You know he's nothing but a fake. He has never cared—_

"Shut UP!" he growled fiercely; hands clenched at his side. That wasn't true about the Colonial. He cared about his subordinates, at the very least. That he was sure of.

He caught Roy's questioning gaze and he quickly scowled as he slapped his hands on the ground. The beams transmuted back into the ground and he heard Roy exhale loudly, though he was still stiff. Ed sighed helplessly then and knelt down next to his superior and offered his hand.

"You look exhausted; we should get out of here."

He held out his automail arm out on purpose; his other arm shaking with pain and the loss of blood. The raven-haired man stared at him for a moment as though contemplating if he was going to attack him again, and he sighed and raised his hand.

"Don't worry. I don't fight dirty. Besides…I'm over it…The drugs from earlier where just still and my system and the fight kind of sobered me up so…"

"Save it, Fullmetal." He blinked; watching the older man as he stood—..Though losing his balance quickly. Edward stood up from his position and made his way over to him; his left arm catching him from the front, and his right steadying him from the back. He wasn't injured just—exhausted. Keeping up with the small alchemist wasn't as easy as he might have thought. Roy stared up at his blood soaked bandages—he hadn't had the time when he rushed out of his apartment to grab his coat—and Ed grinned.

"Ow," he said simply. "That hurt."

There was silence for a moment, and Roy suddenly looked at him with slanted eyes. He flinched mentally.

"Fullmetal. Who where you talking too."

It didn't take a genius to figure out he was talking about his outburst not that long ago.

_God luck, Ed. Now he thinks you're crazy…You should just get rid of him. Save the questions._

He was starting to develop a headache, and he highly doubted this time it was from his wound—but rather, from an annoying Sin. "Eh…" He said pathetically; grinning again as he laughed faintly. "Again, medication. I doubt you've ever tried to function like this." Ed couldn't read the man's cold expression, and it bothered him. He could never tell if his falsetto was working, so he would just have to hope it was on his own.

--------

He was grinning. The golden haired alchemist was _grinning _at him, and only moments ago he was attacking him. Roy was starting to get awfully tired of his antics. Hell; it was tempting to just burn him down where he stood…God knew he wanted too.

He took another look at Edward, and he hesitated for a moment before speaking again. Fullmetal looked noticeably tired, and very drained. And then there was the blood. He sighed; knowing full well that part was from his own actions. Then there was the small detail as to what he was to do with him. Right now he was simply a breaking kid who was hanging limply from the military's leash. Roy didn't want to be the reason for the young alchemist's un-doing, and he idly wondered why Edward had even stayed in the military, while his brother had gone back to his hometown—Risembool, wasn't it? He knew that Alphones had gotten with Ed's mechanic, so was that why? Apparently she had been a childhood friend of the boys'. But what about the girl Ed was with? Rose—wasn't that her name? Armstrong had spoken about her a few times. And now that he thought about it, Fullmetal hadn't mentioned her once since he came back. He couldn't blame him though, after all _this _had happened. It was times like these that he wished Hughes' was here…

"Fullme—Edward," he corrected quickly; clearing his throat. "I think it would be best if you took some time off from your duties here at Central. Maybe go back to Risembool with Rose and see your brother—"

"Don't you dare mention them again."

Edward's voice reeked of dark potent. He was surprised such vehement could come from the younger blond, and it startled him even more to feel the teen trembling as he continued to hold him steady. Had something happened between them? He couldn't imagine what—Last time they spoke they had been so—

"—_Why did you take Rose too!" _

That's right. Fullmetal had yelled that back at his apartment. And he had been speaking to some 'Pride' figure, but no one had been there…

"Edward. What happened to Rose…" he asked carefully; feeling the shorter teen stiffen even more under his weight. His bangs where draped over his eyes in such a way that made it almost impossible to see them, but there was no mistaking the rivet of tears that came streaming down his face just a moment later. Roy had to say, he wasn't expecting that one.

"…I couldn't save her…"

Roy blinked at his tone; what was only moments ago dripping with hate and distain was now so small—so broken. The teen was shaking more, and he turned his head to face him completely. His fists had curled up around the blue fabric of Roy's uniform, and soon collapsed under his own weight to Roy's feet. He didn't look like the strong alchemist everyone had seen him to be. He looked like just a kid.

"I couldn't…I couldn't protect her from anything…I couldn't protect her from the very thing that I am…"

That caught his attention. Maybe now, he would get an explanation to why he has been acting the way he had been. It was obvious that the boy wasn't going to continue on his own, so he kneeled down next to him and rested a firm hand on his shoulder. He never once looked up.

"Fullmetal. You have to tell me what happened." There was a moment of silence before Ed sniffed and clenched the dirt he had gripped within his gloved hands. The teen looked as bad as he had at the incident of Nina Tucker, and that was something that he thought he was never going to have to see again from the young prodigy.

"In Darghton…Jayden's assistant…He had a name. One that I will never allow myself to forget…Richard Dwelling. The bastard deserved everything that came to him…"

He didn't quiet remember who he was talking about at first, so it took him a moment to recall the findings Fullmetal had mentioned at his desk. And even then, he only faintly remembered him mentioning the man. He had said that he wanted to create a homunculus, but that was all. He didn't understand what this had to do with anything, but the young alchemist continued.

"Like I said before…He wanted to make a homunculi. He knew the cost of opening the gate and – and by time I noticed him…she was already…" He was staring at him then, not quite sure what he was getting at. But he soon got his answer, and it was far from one he would have liked. "He used Rose…He was going to use Rose as his ticked to the Gate! She had only come there to surprise me, so we could come back here together but…But she was still alive! She was still alive while she was lying there and I couldn't even save her from that bastard…"

Edward was suddenly clinging onto him, and crying. The boy's mood swings were starting to take a toll on him, and honestly, he didn't know how much more of it he could take. But unsure what to do next, he simply wrapped his arms around the boy and sighed. This was going to be a long day…And it was _still _raining.

"I couldn't..Save her…And she died right there in front me as she called to me…And I couldn't save her! That bastard killed her with alchemy…" Edward choked out another sob, and Roy again, sighed. He wasn't sure if he was ever going to be able to live this down, but he wasn't sure what else to do in this situation…

"Shh," he whispered quietly; obviously uncomfortable in the current situation. "It's alright—It wasn't your fault…"

Edward hiccupped, and didn't say anything back. They stayed there like that for a few more minutes before his sobs quieted down, and the boy went limp in his arms. Huh. The kid had fallen asleep. Well it was better for him now…

"I take it Edward has finally calmed down?"

Roy stiffened in his position, and slowly turned his head back to see none other than Riza; standing there at attention. But it didn't matter how formal she stood—the look of pure amusement was clear as day on his face. God, he wondered how long she had been standing there…

"I thought it would be better if he didn't see me and freak out, so I decided to stand behind the wall for a while…"

He felt a migraine coming on. "…And _how much exactly, _Lt. Hawkeye, did you see and hear?"

"…Quiet enough, Sir. Now I suggest we get going before all three of us catch a cold."

God. Today. Was going to be. A long day.

-------

**AN: Lulz! Yes. I don't know if this made sence. I wrote this on to many random occastions...And I was NOT going to go to sleep tonight until I got this bugger on paper!**

**And Roy is a very difficult person to stay in character with...**

**But yes. You know how in the begining it has it in italics? It was Riza talking. You'll see what that was about iiiinnnn...(drumroll) the next chapter! And on a random note! Do you know what I have to say, ON STAGE, in front of people?**

**"Diaper diaper in the sky! How far will this diaper fly?"**

**Doesn't seem like much. But try going up there, having the script for only the first time, and having to say that? I have to tell you. I broke down laughing the first time.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: OMG. YES. I LIVE.**

**Sorry. School hates me. and it took up all my time. And this is SUCH a short chapter...**

**It's been sitting on my computer and no matter how many times I came back and tried to continue it, nothing came to me. So I'm just going to post this up and start working on the next chapter, since it SHOULD be a bit easier if I do that...And hopefully with a faster update. The thought DID cross my mind today on if I just wanted to abandon this story as well...!!**

**But yeah. Thank you to ALL of my lovely reviewers who showed that they were still reading and hoping for me to continue! And also thank you for all the new people who fave'd and watched--as well as my old watchers. I love you all!~~**

**--------**

'_Sleep…This will all be over soon…Just rest…'_

"Sir! Fullmetal has awoken." Roy turned lazily towards the officer who stood in his doorway, and nodded.

"Very good. Send him in."

The officer backed out into the hallway and ushered the small teen in, taking his leave not a moment later. Something about Edward really irked him then; the pompous grin he wore was infuriating, and the way he stood—Like _he _was the commanding officer—made Roy want to burn him where he stood. Again. But good thing he had more control then that…But the temptation was still there…

"How are you feeling, Fullmetal? Better, I presume by the way you are presenting yourself," he said calmly; leaning back in his chair. Edward shrugged, taking a seat on the couch. He noticed that the boy's eyes never left his own.

"Just fine, thank you…But I do not believe I have ever met you directly…" Edward said steadily. The sound was strange to him; smooth, almost, and very well-mannered. Nothing like Fullmetal. And what was he referring to, 'I have ever met you directly'?

"Um, Fullmetal, you do realize who you're talking to, correct?"

The grin he worse on his face grew, as did Roy's confusion, and apparently it showed.

"Allow me to properly introduce myself and ease your confusion, Colonial Roy Mustang. My body is that of Edward, but, as for who I truly am…Well, you may call me Pride. You know…A homunculus. A pleasure to meet you."

Afraid of trusting others, puts up a false front. Breakable.

Determined, though unsure how to 'deal with things' Outspoken

'_Let me out of this place! Damn it Pride! This isn't your body!'_

He was scared—Terrified, even, of where he was then. There was only darkness. He hated it. He was seeing everything through 'Pride's' eyes, and is was pissing him off! God, what was he going to do!? He was awarded with silence.

"Then allow me to properly introduce myself and ease your confusion, Colonial Roy Mustang. My body is that of Edward, but as for who I truly am…"

'_Pride, NO!'_

"…You may call me Pride. You know…a homunculus. A pleasure to meet you."

Edward watched in silent horror. He knew. Oh, God, he _knew! _Goddamn it! What was he even going to do? Kill him? He couldn't tell…The colonial's face was impassive as ever. There was no sound. Not a word. It was bad enough he knew it, but he was expecting him to react in at least _some way. _But he never did.

"Well, Colonial," There was a blue light surrounding them and a blade of metal being pressed to Roy's neck, and Edward felt his breath stop. "What are you going to do…Remember, my body is His as well. You hurt me, and you also hurt the oth—"

Pride's question was cut short by an explosion; one that sent him on his back. For a moment he thought it was going to be fine but—then, he realized something. It was _he _that was lying there—not Pride. _Him _as _himself, _was sitting there, perplexed by the event that had just happened. But, somehow, he could just picture it—Pride sitting there within his mind, thinking he was so damn pompous, and laughing at what was happening. At the events he had caused. But now, as Edward stared up at the raven-haired alchemist, he was terrified. His dark blue eyes glowed brightly with his resolve.

Roy's hand raised in another snap and he shut his eyes tightly—waiting—

But then he heard a familiar '_CLICK'_, and he slowly opened his eyes.

"Sir! Where is the intrud—Edward!"

He heard footsteps from the doorway behind him, and he held his breath again—unsure of what was going to happen. He had recognized the voice as Riza but, when he saw the look that Roy had, he started to again doubt his safety.

"C-Colonial! L-Lower your hand…"

Edward forced his panic to subside; staring at Roy with as stern of a look as he could muster up at the moment. "It's me," He said again slowly and prayed to whatever God their might be, that he would believe him. It didn't seem like Roy would let up—he still believed that he was Pride. But there was a shot that rang through the air right past the colonial's shoulder, and just by knowing who the shooter was, it was clearly a warning shot.

"Sir! Please remove yourself from Fullmetal immediately…" There was a small pause in the lieutenant's voice, and when she began again, her tone had dropped all form of formalities. "He's just a kid who has been through a lot these past few days…Whatever he's done…"

"Yeah. I got it Lt. Hawkeye. I simply lost my head."

Roy backed off of Edward and offered him his hand, which the stunned teen took graciously. Ed stood up and brushed himself off slowly before a sharp twinge of pain spread through his lower abdomen and he grunted; falling back down onto one knee. Roy stayed still, stone-faced, and watched. Fullmetal could feel the places where he was burned starting to make themselves known as the adrenaline died down, and he closed his eyes in an attempt to subdue the pain, if only a little. It…Didn't seem to be working very well.

_Give me control. My intention before was to kill you but…It wouldn't be worth much of both of them where of witness. Just let me out, and I promise all I'll do is heal you. They haven't seen the mark yet, do they don't know how bad it is._

He was far to tired to think, and with the fear for his life gone, there wasn't much more room for argument—

He once again surrounded his body to the Sin, and silently prayed that he would stay true to his word.

Pride was glad that Ed gave up so easily. If anything, at least it paid to give him a sure run for his money over the past few days. He was mentally exhausted without his brother to lean on now, and it worked completely in His own favor.

"Edward, are you alright?"

When he looked up to the voice, he saw that it was the blonde—Riza, was it? She truly was attractive…But it goes without saying that her heart laid with that of the impassive Flame Alchemist. He wouldn't dare tread on that track. Besides; he was suppose to act like Edward right now…

"Yes; I'm fine…Just a bit of pain for a moment but it's no big deal." He smiled, and on the inside, he was laughing. Alright? He was almost perfect! He had the body now; and if he truly wanted too, he could keep the blonde alchemist in somewhat of a hibernation mode for a bit, even though it would be a little annoying. And as far as that wound went, it had already started rejuvenating the moment his consciousness had taken control. Funny, how simple the human body was…

Pride stood up again and stretched, and looked back to the colonial before he started walking out. He didn't want to stay and involve himself with any idle chat; even with that blond vixen Riza. Roy would certainly be a problem, being as he had completely intended on him killing off Edward. A problem, indeed…

"Fullmetal. I would like to speak with you alone in regards to the scene that I caused." He paused again to look at his lieutenant, who hesitated, but nodded and left without another word and shut the door behind her. Pride stood with his back to him for a few moments before he exhaled and turned around; his eyes lazing over to his.

"Mm? You wanted to talk to me?"

With one beat, which he should have been able to predict, he was in front of him with a pen shoved in his arm. Without much surprise to either parties', the area around the pen began to spark with a familiar red tint and then pen was forced out on its own—the wound completely healed.

"I figured it was still you. The way you stand. It's completely different from Ed."

Pride raised one eyebrow and looked at his 'commanding officer', and shrugged. "I guess I'll have to work on that a bit." He turned around on his heel and started to head out only to have his arm snatched up by the older man. He stayed still.

"..Edward."

He didn't understand what happened then, but he felt a small…something, in his chest. It confused him, but he ignored it and pulled his arm away and continued walking. He didn't need to be here. He hand somewhere else to be…Somewhere with a phone, and privacy. He had a phone call to make to his 'brother dearest.'

Roy stared at his hand for a minute after Edward—No Pride—had pulled himself free. He wasn't quite sure why he had reached out to him, or even why he had called to him. But he did know that he hated seeing that…that _thing _dressed in Edward's skin. It made his own skin crawl, and it made him sick. His Edward was buried under there somewhere, and Pride was running around with his body—

Wait a minute. Did he just say _His _Edward? For some reason, that bothered him…But not in the way that it should have. He didn't understand it. And in some sense…He feared it.

**Author's Note:**

**Poof. It's done. ;O Pride is going to call Alphones! Oh Noes!**

**...Yeah I have no clue where this is going anymore. XD I did when i WROTE this chapter months ago but as of right nowww...I've got nothing. *FAILUREEEE***

**Oh. AND HAPPY DAY LATE THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note: Bah. I live...I think. e e; God. It's been like..Forever since I updated this, and I'm so sorry...!**

**And I hate to say even more that I couldn't go Anywhere with this chapter! I had totally lost my directive that I had when I wrote the last chapter, and that killed me. I know I had something going for Alphones here but... I don't know what happened. It vanished with the wind since I waited so long...!**

**But anyway, to all my reviewers, thanks so much for sticking with me! I hope I haven't lost all of you...!**

**Disclaimer: Yeah. No. I wish, Yes I'm going to keep dreaming that I owned FMA...(Because Brotherhood is kicking ass!)**

The call down to the Rockbell residents had been a quick one. It was a bit to sappy for his taste but… He would survive. He had brushed up briefly on what had happened with Rose, and he instantly knew it could be an advantage…Though he didn't quiet have a plan.

Not a solid one, at least.

"Next stop, Resembool!"

Right. Time to be like Ed.

-x-x-x-x-x-

He had kept his expression stoic on the way to Winry's house where Alphones now lived. But it was okay, because she had easily been able to play it off as being grief stricken from the loss of his girlfriend so suddenly. Truly, he thought it was pathetic how easily they both had taken note of his personality change without a second guess and accepted it… He knew he wasn't trying, so it wasn't Pride's acting skills that he had gotten this far. It was the lack of concern for his persona change.

He felt Ed stir in his mind at that thought and he chuckled. Winry gave him an odd look but he simply shook his head. They were here, and it was time he started paying attention. He needed this to work.

"Brother!" He heard Alphones cry out from the front door, the younger teen running up to him and flinging his arms around his own slender form. He returned the gesture awkwardly. "Brother, it's good to see you! Come inside, please!" The boy was absolutely brimming with happiness, and it was then that he became aware that Edward was awake. His body was suddenly overcome by his nervousness before it cooled and faded into admiration, and allowed himself to be pulled into the house.

"_Please," _Edward pleaded quietly, _"Don't hurt Alphones. Don't hurt my little brother…"_

He never replied to Edward's request. Instead, he allowed himself to be lead into what he assumed was the living room and sat down the couch, his brother doing the same. Their eyes caught then, and he held his breath. There was a certain hardness in his eyes that he couldn't quiet explain, and he couldn't quiet remain impassive to it. He faintly heard the blonde female murmur something about getting tea, but he couldn't seem to break the gaze he had with Alphones. It was un-nerving, to say the least.

"Brother..—Edward.." The blonde muttered quietly; his gaze never faltering. "Why haven't you stayed in contact with us? Why did you leave once I got my body back? Was it something I did? Brother, please, If I did something wrong just—"

The next thing Pride felt was his body hitting the floor.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

"_Al! What happened?"_

"_I don't know! He just suddenly fell over!"_

_Voices? Why were they here? He was in his mind—His sanction—Why can he hear voices? Was he dreaming? No, he can't dream..Can he?_

"_Edward, wake up!"_

_He knew this voice. He could picture her. Blonde hair, beautiful blue eyes…_

"_Brother!"_

_And there was Alphones…_

"Wake up!"

Startled, he shot up from his position on the floor and gasped—Golden eyes wide and alert as they darted around the room, and he finally felt like he could _breath. _What had happened? How did he get here…

"Brother!"

He felt arms wrap themselves around his form and he found himself returning the gesture; the reality of everything starting to kick in. _Right… _He thought, _Pride brought me here. _

"_That's right…" _He heard Pride whisper in his mind. _"But it looks like you weren't quite ready to give me full control…"_

Of course he wasn't! He'd be damned before he gave his body up to some pathetic half-human!

"Ed?"

"Ah, sorry…" He smiled slightly, looking up at the eyes of his brother. He saw his other smile and he couldn't help but laugh; this whole situation was crazy. Alphones stared at him for a moment longer before turning around and whispering something to Winry—Strange, it had been the first time he had actually noticed the blonde girl before she got up from her place behind him and left.

And then once again matching golden eyes were locked on his.

"Edward…Is there something wrong? I…First you leave without a word and no contact, and then you come back like this..—Brother, I'm worried!"

What was he suppose to say? Everything was wrong. He had a homunculus inside his _head, _He'd tried to kill himself _Twice, _And then _Rose… _

"I…"

"Brother, you can tell me anything…"

He didn't want to have to lie to his other half.

"_But you will anyways. Because deep down, no matter what he says…You know he wouldn't believe you if you tried to explain to him what was really going on inside your head…"_

Edward bit his lip; golden orbs swimming with guilt as he tore his gaze away from his brother. What was he suppose to say? His world was falling apart, he didn't want to be here. He _Couldn't _be here, not like this. He'd wanted to come back when everything was sorted out, when he knew what was going on because – He just couldn't lie to him.

"Yeah, Alphones…I'm fine. Just…" He took a deep breath and composed himself. "…Sad."

He hated his brother seeing him like this. He knew that he looked pathetic—Nothing like the person he was before. He was _disgusting. _

"Look, Al… I think I'm going to bed…Night."

"But brother, you haven't had dinner—"

He was already making his way up the stairs before he was finished.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

'_Oy, Ed.'_

He groaned softly as he turned himself onto his back as he stared up at the ceiling from the bed; annoyed. "Shut up."

'_Aw…' _The homunculus said in a mock-hurt tone, _'That hurts…You don't want to speak with me?'_

"Not really," He answered truthfully. He wasn't too concerned with speaking allowed, since he knew both Winry and his brother were downstairs right now. "I'm still hoping that if I just ignore you, then you'll go away."

He knew it was a pretty pointless thought, and apparently his Sin did too, because he could hear the dark chuckle pervade through his mind in a seemingly endless echo. It still pissed him off.

'_Come now, Edward…Can't we be friends? After all, we are sharing the same body now…'_

"Yeah, and you're trying to take it over."

'_Touché…But don't you think we should at least become friends while _You're _still here? After all, I understand you better than anyone else..'_

"Can you please shut up? I'm trying to sleep. And _I'm _not going to go anywhere. You're the one who's going to be leaving."

'_Believe what you want Edward Elric…But at the end of the day, know that I'm the one who has the most will to carry on…'_

Edward remained silent and simply closed his eyes. He didn't give the Sin an answer, because truthfully, he didn't know what to say.

He couldn't deny the truth that he was right.

**-x-x-x-x-x-x-**

**Huzzah. It's over. e e; Such a HELL CHAPtER! This one is not pleased!**

**But meh. I didn't want Alphones to be here. But it's not like I could exactly not do that, because I put in the LAST chapter that he was going to be! And It wouldn't be good to go edit a chapter...So I simply stuck in a filler. e e; **

**Next chapter? I have _Plans _that _Shall _be carried out! Roy's gonna be there. And it's going to be interestinggg~~**

**So yeah,I'm not dead, and nor will I be. I have the ending thought out kinda, and the story shall liiive..! **

**Lets..just pretend this.. not so great chapter didn't happen...e e; (And reviews make me happy..!)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: Woah. What the hell, right? I'm updating this story after labeling it as 'discontinued'? Bahahaha. **

**In my defense, I really did think I was done with it. Actually, the last piece of writing I've done before this was "_Forget Me Not," _and that was written back in June of 2010...It was pretty much a case of major writers block. I literally have not been able to write a single word, no matter how many ideas I had. Weird, and even more annoying. D: I finally decided to try and spit something out of my head to try and overcome it, and...going off of something I already started seemed like a better idea than trying for a one-shot. (I kept trying and...incidentally, failing. Hard.)**

**Soo...Here you have it! The next chapter of a story that was suppose to be abandoned! (Please don't kill me!)**

**Disclaimer: Nope. I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. And may I say, Brotherhood was _kickass!_  
**

_Damn, why does this walk have to take so long…_I groaned, trudging down one of the many streets of Central. I had gotten off the train not long ago, and I swear I had heard my bed calling to me from miles away. _"Oh, Edward, come back to me!~"_ I closed my eyes for a moment as I walked; fully enveloped in my dream world until I felt the pressure of something on me –

"Oh!"

Blinking my eyes open quickly, I realized that I had stumbled into Gracia. Grinning sheepishly, I rubbed the back of my head. "Sorry about that…probably should have been paying a bit more attention to where I was going. Are…you hurt, or anything?"

"Oh no, don't worry about me I'm fine! It was just a small bump after all. How have you been? Elicia has been asking me nonstop when you and Winry were going to visit along with Alphonse."

She smiled at me and I soon realized that I had returned the gesture. I chuckled slightly when I got a better look at her – that Colonel Bastard could go shove it; I was almost as tall as Gracia!

"Ah, you know. As good as one can be with the military tossing me around all the time…" and my mind, I almost added, but thought better of it. "I…well, I'm sure Al and Winry would love to see you two again. I'll give them a call next time."

"Oh thank you Edward, that means a lot." She smiled again, and rose her arm up to check her watch. "Forgive me though, I really must be going – It was great seeing you again."

"You too, Gracia. Take care."

She nodded at me before walking past me, but not before grabbing my hand and pushing something into it – a piece of paper? – but before I could ask her about it, she was already well on her way. Unfolding the small slip, there was only one thing written on it: _"Central Library, 9:00 PM tonight." _So she wanted to meet? About what?

Either way, it was still only six, so I had some hours to kill before that.

"Bed…~ Wait for me…~"

I didn't find it strange that my Sin had been completely silent since we had stepped on the train from Resembool. It was one of those sayings, or whatever. Count your blessings, right?

**x-x-x-x-x-x**

_There was…darkness? No, darker, it was pitch black, like it was trapping the light out itself. What…?_

"_Edw..rd."_

_My name? I can't hear. There's too much noise, static, but not, like the darkness is leaking into my ears…_

"_..ck. Don't..,"_

_It's too loud. Your voice is too muddled, you have to speak up or I can't hear you. Who are you?_

"_..ou. Wa..up."_

"_Edward."_

**x-x-x-x-x-x**_  
_

My eyes drifted open and immediately over to the clock – 8:44. I still had some time before I had to be there, but barely. Damn it, I knew I should have set an alarm or something…

"Damn it! Ah, whatever, guess there's no time…"

Throwing on a plain black long sleeved shirt and slipping on my shoes, I finally headed out the door. I fiddled with my pocket watch idly as I once again ventured the street, no longer finding the silence comforting. However, not wanting to be the one to break it between my sin and I, I kept going until I reached the library.

"9:10. Better late than never, I suppose."

Pushing my way through the doors, the lady at the front desk just smiled and waved. I waved back out of formality and continued through the rows of books before finding Gracia sitting at one of the small tables by herself with a few books; a few of which I recognized as alchemy books. She seemed to have noticed me and waved me over before turning back to the one she was currently had open. Silently I pulled up a seat across from her and watched as she skimmed though the pages of the alchemy text. Could she really understand what all was there?

"I'm glad you came, Edward. There was something I had been needing to talk to you about…I hope this wasn't an inconvenience to you?"

I shook my head. "No, it's fine. But if you don't mind me asking, m'am…Why are you reading an alchemy textbook?"

There was a short pause, and for a moment, I thought she wasn't going to answer. But after a second she took a deep breath and flipped the book closed while propping her elbows up on the table; resting her chin on her hands as she closed her eyes.

"I was seeing what all these books and notes had to say about human transmutation."

My heart sank. Human transmutation? She wouldn't…Hughes…Would she really…

"Miss Gracia…" I cleared my throat, staring at her with wide eyes. "You wouldn't…try and bring your husband back, right? Hughes…He wouldn't…you just can't…" Was this what she wanted to ask me about? How Al and I transmuted our "mother"?

She broke my train of thought with a laugh; leaning back in her chair while opening her eyes to stare at the ceiling.

"It says in all these books that it's forbidden. Every one of them. The greatest taboo man could ever commit…How could I ever think I could pull something like that off. No one has ever been able to do it, no matter what their skill level was." Another laugh. "I'm no God."

My heart sunk even further into my chest, and I felt like I was going to puke. That's exactly what I had thought. I was God. Maybe not directly, or with those words, but…with my actions. I built myself a pair of wax wings crafted from alchemy, and tried to fly through the skies that belonged to the heavens. And to make matters worse, I nailed a pair of metal wings right onto my brother…So when we got too close to the sun, my wax wings melted all the way down my arm and leg, and sent me into the sea. And my brother…My brother doomed to sink to the very bottom. We played God…Drowned ourselves in the 'magic' that made us feel like we owned it all. We played, and…we lost.

My fists tightened in my lap, and from the corner of my eye I saw Gracia sit back up. I didn't know what to say to her. What _could _I say? It was my fault that Hughes was…

"Edward…How is Pride doing?"

My blood ran cold.

"W-What?" I managed to spit out before snapping my head up to stare at her. She was just looking at me with that smile on her face…Had I heard wrong? Or…did Mustang say something to her? How else would she know? But for what purpose would he…?

"You heard me the first time, didn't you? How – Is – Pride? And don't act ignorant, I know you know exactly what I'm talking about."

"But…But how do you…"

"Know about him? It's simple, really. I've been watching you for a long while, Fullmetal Alchemist. That, and the Truth knows a whole hell of a lot of things."

And suddenly it clicked. Brown hair slowly sparked to black, green eyes became amethyst purple, and a light voice suddenly became dark and rough.

"Envy…"

_Sleep. Now._

The world slowly faded to black – a color, I realized, that I was growing to know far too well.

**x-x-x-x-x-x**

The blond Alchemist's eyes opened right before his head hit the table and sighed. From in front of him, Envy smirked before chuckling again. "What, is it really such a shocker, Fullmetal pipsqueak? You should be marveling at the fact that I'm still alive!"

"The only thing that I find myself able to 'marvel' about is how much you're able to run your mouth. And change back to that women – there are people around…not to mention your usual form is an eyesore."

"The nerve of you to say something like that to me you pea sized piece of shi—"

"…If you want to keep that pathetic life you've managed to catch, I would recommend holding your tongue when you speak with me, Envy."

"Pride, huh…"

Stiffening, Envy allowed the red alchemic sparks to dance across his skin as he morphed back into Gracia Hughes; the sin still not daring to move. From under the table and around his legs he could feel small, claw-like hands slowly making their way up his body. Pride merely smiled before relaxing himself back in his chair; a smirk playing devilishly across his features.

"Loosen up, 'Miss Gracia'…You're so tense…is something bothering you?"

Pride's grin only widened when Envy swallowed loudly and clenched his jaw; his chin lifting slightly at the contact of the small, pitch black hands. "There must be a reason that you called me here, after all…"

"Oh, you know, just wanted to see if you were staying out of trouble…You've been making quite a scene, so the whispers of some members of the military say."

Envy twitched slightly as the black hands suddenly tightened their grip around his neck; Pride himself only narrowing his eye as he leaned forward in his seat again. "I was just seeing what I was able to get away with in this body," He replied smoothly, his eyes never leaving Envy's gaze, "After all, I don't have complete control yet…"

The dark hands reseeded back as Envy touched his neck before sneering; glaring back at the younger blond that sat before him. "Oh? And what do you plan to do now?"

"I should think it would be obvious…" Pride traced his finger across the table in various shapes, grinning to himself as he slowly closed his eyes. "I plan to take this body for my own. All I have to do is crush that 'will' of Edward's…"

"And you expect that to be easy? In case you haven't noticed, that runt's pretty resilient when in terms of being stubborn as a mule." Envy scoffed as he crossed his arms, noticing that Pride had stopped his previous motions and was staring at the table. "Well?" He asked, curious.

"I was just going about things the wrong way…I'll just have to crush the person who seems to have the most connections to him."

"Ohh? And who would that be? That blonde girl? His brother?"

"No…Someone much closer." Pride's grin turned into an all-out smirk; his eyes glancing up to meet those of the other Sin's. "Roy Mustang will do just fine."

**x-x-x-x-x-x**

"Ac-choo!"

"Sir?"

Mustang sniffed before rubbing his nose and dropping his head back onto the table that was currently occupying its usual pile of paperwork; groaning loudly. "Someone's talking about me. Probably telling me that it's too late to be working…" He murmured quietly as he allowed his eyes to shut for a moment. Being forced to work this late…it should be a crime. It may have been occupying his mind so that he could keep his thoughts off of Fullmetal but…

:"That doesn't make any of this go by any quicker!"

From a chair beside him, Hawkeye sighed; shaking her head as she glanced out the window from behind them. _Tonight's going to be a long night… _

**AN: And...it's done. Lol, I'm sorry if it was complete icky-ness in terms of writing. Like I said, this was my desperate attempt to write something so that I might be able to start again...Let's hope it didn't fail?**

**Yep, I borrowed Pride's power from Brotherhood...I swear, this was a lot easier to write when I didn't know everything I do now. Because now it's not even sticking with a specific timeline...It's completely mismatched and patched together with different elements from different things XD Sorry for that.**

**PS: I think I got some characterization wrong. I haven't read or watched anything Fullmetal Alchemist related...I actually just got done watching _Pandora Hearts, _and am off to read the Manga because the anime ending did NOT please me...Like srsly. D:**

**Anywho. Hope you enjoyed at least slightly! And remember, don't kill me, please?~**

**(Oh, and kudos to whoever can spot the myth I referenced in here! Albeit kind of loosly...)  
**


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